Easter 2011

I'm just catching up on my blog a little. Easter was great this year. We had the Durands in town and boy, it spoiled me. I miss my Shan so much and Cort sure enjoyed having CJ. We took a girls day and went shopping in Round Rock, then on Thursday Shannon and I took the boys to the new Legoland in Grapevine. It was great fun.

If I only teach them one thing...

As a mom there are soo many things I do wrong. Most nights I lay awake and just think about opportunities I missed, things I said, you know, just the normal mom worries. Well on Monday I was reminded of something I must have done right!

Monday afternoon Kate had an orchestra audition for school. In Midway, it's a dog eat dog world. You have to truly earn all of your spots because it's just such a big school. Kate was wanting to be a part of the Chamber orchestra next year. This is an advanced orchestra that is audition only. She did not make Chamber orchestra last year, and was disappointed, but faced the year with Symphonic orchestra and did great. I contacted all of my family and had them praying for Kate on Monday at 1:30 as was I.

Monday after school Kate got in the car all smiles and said " I know I did good mom" . She told me that she walked in and saw the music she had to sight read and immediately got nervous. She told me that she prayed a prayer in her head that God would help her. I'm just listening this whole time... then she excitedly told me that somehow her fingers just played the piece and when it was over, she was like WOW.. I think I got it right! Mom... it was weird. I felt like God was helping me.

Can I just say what my heart did at that moment? Just to have my daughter tell me that she followed the verse we've always taught her and felt it! Psalm 37:5 " Commit Your ways to the Lord, Trust Him and He will give you the desires of your heart" WOW.. WOW ... WOW... I'm sooo proud of her for remembering that, acting on it, then sharing it with me.

There are so many things I do wrong that make me an annoying parent. I dried her very favorite sweater and now it fits Caroline, I embarrass her in front of her friends all the time, I don't always speak in love, and I leave her to babysit her brothers far too often, but if I only ever teach them ONE THING and one thing only ... teaching them to call out to God is it!

These days there are so many things that I can't control for them. I can't protect them like I could when they were babies, and that is scary. Everytime Caroline leaps over that beam I panic that her foot will slip and she'll be injured. EVERY TIME!! Not to mention flying over the vault upside down and swinging like a monkey around a bar over and over. I just have to trust that she's commiting her acts to the Lord and that He will protect her.


Each time Cort goes out to play a game, my prayer for him would be that he would learn to use his talents for the Lord and with that what could be against him? And Clayton... well, I'd just like him to memorize the verse at this point :)



Thank you, Kate, for reminding me this week that I'm not all that bad and through my errors as a mom... God is still working for good :) And...I'd like to Announce that Kate will be a member of the Chamber Orchestra next year. SHE MADE IT! Congratulations, Kate.

Just As I Am.. flip flops and all

This weekend has been absurdly busy. I mean... spring has SPRUNG amongst the Castle Family. Yesterday the boys had 3 baseball games, 2 soccer games, a birthday party and Kate had dance and K life social. I also had tickets to take the girls and a friend to Gotta Sing Gotta Dance, so the day was just crazy. Well, two of those baseball games included a tournament which continued today, Sunday.

Last night late we got the email that Cort's Select team, The Midway Missiles, would be playing this morning at 9:00 am. When I see those kinds of emails I just get a funny feeling in my stomach. I wasn't raised to miss church on Sunday and especially train my kids to believe that their sports are more important than acknowledging Christ in worship on Sundays. It's just a conviction I have.

Coach Davis and Coach Castle aka, Dad, share my conviction, I'm sure, but also have the conviction of my son completing what he started which means finishing out his baseball tournament with the team. Plus, he's a crusher and a team player who couldn't feel right about leaving the team down one. These tournaments are few and far between at this point, so it's not like this is the decision every Sunday. Regardless, it's still tough for me.


Today the Missiles played hard, but lost their 9:00 game. So sad that they lost, but this left me plenty of time to make the 10:30 service at church. YEAH! I rush away from the field, head to the car, get to church, park, am rushing in and look down and realize.. OH dear... it's Sunday morning, I'm in the choir, and I'm wearing my comfy jeans, a Midway Missiles Spirit Shirt and flip flops. What to do? Well, I'll tell you what I did... I walked right in, ended up on the front row of the choir and worshipped my heart out.. And all because I know God loves me Just as I am.

That's such a great feeling... to be loved just as you are. In a world where so many of us pass judgment on each other, sometimes without even realizing it, just to know that God sees straight to our hearts. He ignores the clothes, the make up, the hair do, and just sees our hearts. Not comparing us to another, and not counting our faults... just loving us. Gorgeous thoughts, I'll tell you. Just to know that God loves this busy, proud mom with a heart for worship just as I am. Flip flops on and all. Thank you, Jesus.

We're going Skiing.. Oh Dear!

Tomorrow morning we leave for a LONG LONG drive to take our kids to Pagosa Springs, Colorado to go snow skiing. This is their first experience, and we're looking forward to it.. But, It is not their momma's first experience.

I have terrible skiing stories.. all three times I went! The first time our church youth group chartered a bus and drove down to Santa Fe, NM. About 2 days in, a friend of mine fell and injured her knee terribly. The poor girl was is so much pain on the way home. She was laying in the floorboard of the bus the whole way back with her knee up just praying through every terrible bump that we hit. It was awful.

The second time I went skiing our youth group loaded up to Crested Butte, Co. My grandad was the pastor of our church and he and my grandmother decided to come along with the youth. Well, as soon as we arrived, my "Padre" fell to the ground and had a massive heart attack because of the altitude. He was taken to the hospital, but did not survive. Our entire family... devastated... took a flight home together and said goodbye to our precious Padre.

The final time I went skiing was when I was newly married and Chad and I went with some friends. I did the greens the first day and was feeling pretty confident. Chad talked me into going up a double lift.. in Taos... and ended up on a blue. I couldn't get down... spent 3 hrs on the mountain crying with my husband of only 6 months and was finally taken down by the ski patrol. I remember crying as our friends were all watching us from our ski in ski out condominium window. Totally embarrassing.

But, this week, I'll be putting on the skis one more time and doing it in the name of my children. I think they deserve the opportunity to try out skiing and decide for themselves if skiing is for them or not. Let's all hope that this opportunity is my first postive one. Lord, be with us :0)

Why are "I'm Sorry's " So hard?

So once again it's 1:26am and I can't sleep. Could it be the Pepsi Max that's currently in my refrigerator? While I'm laying awake and the house is quiet, I'm just thinking and praying and having some good ole soul searching time. I just started thinking about I'm sorrys... You know, the I'm sorry that you're hurting or I'm sorry I was late.... just the meaning of I'm sorry.

To me, I'm sorry is so powerful. Sometimes it's just what we need to hear to get a feeling of peace instead of dread in of our hearts. And it works both ways. Everytime I've ever delivered an I'm sorry.. It actually felt GREAT too. It's amazing how an argument just can't continue when I'm sorrys are delivered.

I can think of a couple of times as a little girl when I got fussed at pretty heavily by my mom, went to my room crying, and a little while later had my mom come find me and say " Kes, I'm sorry. I went too far. " I can't tell you what that meant to me as a little girl. And now as a mom, thinking about the example that set for me is priceless.

Recently, Caroline received a text from her friend that was something to the affect of "That was really not nice what you did at lunch," Well, my Caroline.. and love her, I do... often times doesnt even realize she's upset a friend. She's just programmed a little like her Daddy and sometimes her sensitive side doesnt show up. She just doesn't even realize. Well, as soon as this text arrived to her phone she told me about it. I asked her what she did and she couldn't remember.. but clearly she never meant to hurt her friends feelings, and obviously it was bothering her friend. Caroline simply texted back.. with some mom coaching, "I'm so sorry I hurt your feelings. I would never mean to. Please forgive me." Those words are so powerful if you think about it. She kept her friend.

Last week I sorta blessed out the director at Clayton's Pre K. She slipped a note in his lunchbox telling me I owed $10 for a late pickup. Well, I couldn't for the life of me remember picking him up late, but it's probable with the life I lead. I went in and asked about it.. she got defensive, I called her bill pathetic and walked rudely out.. in front of others. I KNOW>.. totally embarrasing. Well, it bothered me all day. As much as I tried to justify that I was right, it still bothered my heart. I knew that I should have handled the situation better and really didnt honor Christ with my words, so later that day I called her and apologized... with all of my kids in the car.. totally embarrasing, but honestly, I couldn't live with myself until I did. It felt great!

I always find myself apologizing to Chad too. I'm sorry I ran the debit card out. I'm sorry I didn't wash your undershirts... I'm sorry I got a speeding ticket in your new truck ;(.. which reminds me... The I'm sorry with the Police officer got me NOWHERE... Any way. Sometimes apologizing to the ones closest to us is the hardest.

Last week Caroline had a friend say, "My mom said I have to tell you I'm sorry.. so, Sorry". Some would say that wasn't heartfelt and forget it, but what I say is Kudos to mom for teaching her daughter the importance of I'm sorry... being humble and precious before a friend and making a wrong situation right. Teaching our children to have a heart for others and not always for ourselves is so important. It speaks volumes.

So, I guess I would say all in all... if your heart tells you that you need to, just say I'm sorry. You'll both be blessed :)

Telling one on my guy... Happy Valentine's Day

In honor of Valentine's Day, I'm going to tell a fun story about my husband :) Chad and I met through our roomates our Sophmore Year at Baylor. He asked me out, we did Homecoming and it was great. But, I didn't really see a future with him, so we opted to just be friends. We were GREAT friends. He was my FAVORITE friend as a matter of fact. We set each other up on dates and would even double date with different dates. Kinda funny for sure. Well, suddenly one day about a year and half later, I decided that I actually thought of him more than a friend. We discussed it, kissed, and a dating relationship began.

Well, Chad.. bless his sweet heart.. doesn't have a history of being the best gift giver. Thankfully, he's improved tremendously over the years, but in 1993, he had serious issues.

It was Valentine's Day. I, in my usual sentimental state, had worked long and hard on a picture collage of the two of us at all of our events and was planning to present it to him on Valentine's Day. He worked late and I finally got word that he was home from work at his apartment. Over I went proudly with my Valentine's gift. All wrapped... all done up... all proud. Of course he graciously accepted my gift.

About 2 hours later he came knocking on my door holding a 3 foot tall Cornplant with a red bow around it. Yes, my friends... My now husband never considered Valentine's Day until it was almost midnight. At which point he went to the Baylor florist moments before they closed and bought what they had left. No roses... no teddy bears... no candy... A Cornplant. :) But, I loved that Cornplant because it came from my Valentine.. My love.

Happy Valentine's Day, Baby.. But, please, no cornplant this year :)

Snow Day 2011

What a fun day! We were blessed with lots of snow this past Friday.. no school.. and lots of fun. Nothing better than a surprise four day weekend. The kids enjoyed snow ball fights, sledding and building snowmen. Thankfully, I've been gathering clothes for the kids to take on our ski trip for spring break. These sure came in handy. It was so much fun and just a nice day.